As the Toto Turns 45

by Andy Shen

Lazy week, classic Toto.

I forced this one on Schmalz. He’s always trying avoid political themes.

Bush’s first line is a reference to Rumsfeld saying he knew where Iraq’s WMD’s are. He said they were in Baghdad and Tikrit and to the east, west, north and south. Which, I think, narrows it down to the entire country. He latered denied that statement despite making it on videotape.

And…another short Levi crack.

Bush once gave a reporter a hard time (in his trademark dickish manner) for wearing sunglasses during an outdoor press conference. It was later revealed that the reporter was legally blind.

Zabriskie seems stoned. Another recurring theme.

Floyd wore yellow silk ties to his hearing. Then one day he wore a black tie and the media tried to read something into it.

All the ‘waas’ are from Jon Stewart’s impression of Cheney as The Penguin.

I kinda like the Bush head, but I literally drew the hair strand by strand. I realized that I had to learn to draw hair in a more stylized way or never sleep on a Monday night again.

 

schmalz Judging by the multitude of factual statements involved on this page, you can surmise that Andy regularly watches the news. Sometimes I watch The Daily Show or I’ll listen to NPR, sometimes I don’t; so any sort of political commentary is unfamiliar territory to me. If it were up to me, we’d be doing lots of jokes about bodily functions and bad European haircuts. Political blowhards just don’t interest me.


I have no idea which parts of this I contributed, but I’m pretty sure my obsession with Hincapie’s racing jackets, DZs mellowness and drunk dialing surfaced here.

 

 

24 Comments

Anonymous

what’s the funny part? that the guy is vegan? or makes $1100/month and lives at home? or is overtraining really hard?

Anonymous

Lay off the guy. He lost like 100 pounds and is super amped about our sport. Yes he is a bit clueless on how to train properly and is putting himself way out there in to be mocked but he is doing it all for the love we all share. He loves to ride and his bikes have clearly changed his life for the better. We need more positive guys like him.

JFG

Anonymous

The guys is clueless and a bit full of himself thinking he is the next Jens Voigt yet has not idea how to even train tempo in the off season. However, he seems new to the sport and loves to ride. I love that he is passionate about the sport and not afraid to show it.

Anonymous

He needs to stop spending money on bikes and gear and focus on continuing to lose some weight. He also needs to lose that Vegan stuff. It’s ok to tell a girl you want to sleep with but everyone knows you need meat to get power…he should be the Power Meater!

Anonymous

i’m all for people adopting whatever diet fits their lifestyle or views. but why do vegans always feel the need to let us know they are vegan? always adopting it in their screennames, tattoos, t-shirts. get over yourselves.

Anonymous

Being a vegetarian should never be associated with being a revolutionary or being open-minded. that’s a dietary choice.

Anonymous

i’ve seen some of you herbivores, and if you want to argue health, y’all need to eat some kind of supplement because some of y’all are so skinny that it’s disgusting

Anonymous

look, let me make something
abundantly clear for people
who are so bereft of activities
they feel like they gotta comment on mine.
first of all being a vegetarian should
never be associated with being
a revolutionary or being open-minded.
that’s a dietary choice.
if someone wants to proliferate the
type of ignorance we’re supposed to
be fighting by thinking that,
you’re just fucking yourself.
i don’t go around promoting
beef and poetry shoving it in
people’s faces.
i don’t castigate people for not
eating steak sandwiches;
and i would never diss someone
for being a fucking broccoli-head,
or living off of radishes,
or eating grass or tofu.
i like a lot of vegan cuisine.
but the illogicality of expecting
everyone to adopt their particular
idea of what being healthy is
is just preposterous.
i’ve seen some of you herbivores;
and if you want to argue health,
y’all need to eat some kind of supplement
because some of y’all are so skinny
that it’s disgusting; looking like the
only hip-hop motherfuckers on schindler’s list.
being a malnutrition-ass got nothing to do
with being revolutionary or being on-point.
i’ll be damned if i let somebody else push
their agenda on me. you know i don’t eat pork,
not because i’m a muslim, i just don’t
really like it, but i really will
fuck a bird up. and fish is good
when that shit is fresh. it’s like my nigga
from. if you don’t like
the smell of burning meat, well then get
the fuck off the planet. you know i don’t
criticize people for eating moss,
then don’t open your fucking mouth
about my food, man. i like beef
and broccoli motherfucker. mind
your god-damn business. matter of fact…
you know what? i’m out. i feel like some
arroco pollo, a banana daiquiri, and
a motherfucking bistec aponado.

Anonymous

Someone in US, that used to eat meat and was told it’s the only way but then stopped and became vegetarian, would see it as revolutionary. Someone that say, grew up in India, born into being vegetarian, would see it as a common way of life. It’s all relative my friend.

Anonymous

I’ve seen some of you ‘carnivores’ on my operating table and let me tell you, you ain’t so pretty on the inside yourself…Doogie Howser, M.D.

Anonymous

nice artwork Andy, I counted 5 shades of gray! ala grizzly adams, but instead of a bear a nice mtb on the ranch, aahh, the golden years…here we come!

Anonymous

how to be or eat.. oh except for that 200 million dollar ad campaign “Beef, real food for real people”
and another thing…

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