Andy Shen and I drove up to Westport, CT to take advantage of the generosity of Rick Spear and the staff of TARGETRAINING, so let’s throw in a bwahh-ha-ha-ha! for both of us to get the ball rolling.

@##=#<1,L>@##=#That being said, Rick offered to have his staff conduct VO2 tests on us. Now, to me it seemed that throwing myself onto a VO2 tester would be akin to tossing a Trabant into a wind tunnel, but a free test is a free test. Who am I to turn down his offer?

The Facility

TARGETRAINING is a well thought-out and very inviting, comfortable place. The upstairs studio is the nicest “gym” I have ever been to. I felt a little out of my league, but the staff was very friendly and helpful, so I was ordering people around in no time. And let me just say that they have the nicest bathroom/changing areas I have ever seen, each with it’s own private shower. Mmm, bathrooms…

As far as the equipment goes – all of it was brand new, they had every machine you could ever need, and they had a Technogym Kinesis machine that I believe is used to train astronauts.

We went downstairs to the room that’s set up for testing and cycling related activities – another very nice room. Wood floors, plasma screen, sound system, they all made the room a nice, comfortable place where you could actually do one of those 4 hours nutcase rides indoors without needing therapy afterwards. Those intimidating feelings came back again, and I felt my inner Trabant coming to the surface.

The Test

Not that any of this mattered, I was there to get tested, but I also not so secretly wanted to beat Andy’s numbers and take the lead in our little battle of the kittens. Of course, the tests weren’t a competition, but I foresaw the claws coming out.

We both got hooked into the Velodyne machines on our bikes and went through our warm ups. Andy was to my left and I resisted the urge to throw an elbow in his direction.

The deal with Vo2 testing is that the test is all about your oxygen use, so you need to have a Hannibal Lecter style mask strapped to your head to catch all of the air coming out of you. This is a little awkward at first, but once you get to the heavy breathing portion of the test, the mask is the least of your worries. It actually becomes comfortable when you get used to it – like a neoprene breath sucking cocoon.

Our tester was Eneas Freyre, a bona-fide professional bike racer, so it was nice to have a very experienced racer to administer the test, but I also wanted to make sure I didn’t look like a creampuff in front of the pro – that’s just so embarrassing. Eneas is a very committed and serious professional – needless to say, I think he was glad when the mask went over my mouth.

Andy went first. The test starts at a relatively low wattage, so the beginning is pretty low key. Well, as low key as you can be with a face mask strapped to your head to measure every breath. The intensity increases incrementally until you can’t go on anymore. Pretty simple in theory – painful in practice.

Andy took his ride on the pain train and then Eneas crunched his numbers while I hopped on my bike.

Schmalz Test

Because I’m nutcase, I found it intimidating doing a VO2 test in front of professionals, if I tested out very low, I’d feel like a wimp, if I tested out in the high range, I would feel like a slacker. That being said, the plan was to have Eneas ramp up the wattage target and to have me match the number in intervals ranging from 1 to 2 minutes. As the test went on I developed an obsession for matching the two wattage (mine and the target) numbers on the display. It soon became the focus of my world of pain. I was even able to zone out Mihael and Andy (but not Eneas), there’s something to be said for VO2 testing.

To protect the innocent (me), I’m going to keep my numbers classified, but I can tell you that I have a VO2 max that is 6 points higher than Andy Shen. Let me repeat that – 6 points higher, as in better, or even superior to Andy’s numbers.

The Details

TARGETRAINING

772 Post Road East

Westport CT 06880

website

Equipment used:

Velodyne Trainer

New Leaf Fitness Active Metabolic Training Systemâ„¢ with Exersmart Software

Thanks to Marco Quezada for photos 15 through 22.