This is our best guess at what road bikes will look like in two or three years.

Swoops: You’ve sold all the straight tubed bikes you can. Time to sell bikes with curved tubes.

Bumps: Smooth tubes are for suckers. Put some wrinkles in it.

Integrated seat masts: Used bike sales cut into new bike sales. Better to sell bikes that ship with a saw and a saw guide. Now you can only sell your bike to people whose legs are the same length or shorter. This is awful for a short legged hobbit like myself.

Skinny seatstays: Cervelo’s R3 has some unbelievably thin seatstays. If they all survive the year look for other makers to follow suit. Then someone will swoop it.

Note: Schmalz comments are italicized. Another way of recognizing Schmalz’s work – his comments are funny.