Welcome to the Team
We were really impressed by your race resume and essay (some think that a 5,000 word easy is a bit extreme, but we find it really helps to get to know a candidate), so that means I am authorized to offer you a spot onto next year’s squad. Congratulations! We’ve got a great group of guys and gals and we hope you fit right in to our gang of merry racers. I’ve included our 10 page code of conduct PDF for you to look over, and a breach of any of those rules will be grounds for termination and forfeiture of any team clothing.
Speaking of which, right now we’ve only got a summer jersey for you. You are required to wear it whenever you train or race (page 3 on the PDF covers all the team clothing rules), so just wear it over your current clothing until the next team order goes in. We’re waiting on Jeff to decide whether he wants a pair of shoe covers, because without his order we won’t make the minimum. As soon as Jeff makes up his mind, we’ll have the order in, and we’ll need your Paypal deposit.
Now that the business is out of they way, let’s discuss the fun stuff—swag! We get a 5% discount on energy bars and drinks, and that goes up to 7% if you order cases in bulk. You just need to fax your order in to the manufacturer during Shanghai business hours. We also get a 10% discount on merchandise AND labor at our shop, but they don’t give the labor discount to ANYONE, so please keep that to yourself. Frequenting any other shop is grounds for termination (page 2 on the PDF). We also get a great discount on professional services from our main sponsor, so if you need any contracts written, you know where to go! Paul has done a lot of work getting and maintaining great relationship with our sponsors, so be sure to mention them in alphabetical order if you ever appear in any sort of media. (Media relations is covered on page 6 of the PDF).
Social media. We find that using social media helps us gain a great ROI for our sponsors. We require at least four blog entries on the team site from each of our racers, you must also join Facebook, Twitter, Strava, Instagram and Chat Roulette. You can also submit tweets to be published to our team Twitter account. Share as much as you can! Photos are the best way to promote the team—especially if the photos include sponsor logos ; ). You can also submit reviews of sponsor products, but these reviews must be first approved by the team and the sponsor’s marketing department. (Sponsor relations are covered on page 8 of the PDF). If you complete a training ride in unique conditions, such as temperatures below 25 degrees or in Mallorca, please document the ride with photographs and post to the team social media.
Race conduct. We expect all racers to know and follow all USAC rules (you don’t have to memorize them, but should be VERY familiar with them, as this comes in handy if we need to DQ another rider). We develop our race plans via email chain in the days before the races. Please stick to the race plan during races. (Failure to follow race plans is ground for termination. Boy, do I sound like a broken record!) We realize that all our racers are interested in upgrade points, so we try to plan accordingly. We discourage fraternizing with other teams during races—it’s hard to beat people who you think are friends, so just keep quiet. We require 30 days of racing a years from our racers. (The PDF contains the upcoming year’s race calendar, you can go to our web site and fill in the dates you will be racing.) You can also add your training schedule to the team’s "private" section of the website—we don’t want those numbers getting out, do we?
And in closing, I realize that this is a lot to take in at once, but we’re here to help you out. (Page 10 of the PDF has a FAQ section about joining the team.) A lot of our new racers are intimidated when they join the area’s most visible category four team, but we think you’ll fit in just fine in time. If you have any questions or concerns, you can leave me a voice mail, and I’l get back to you as soon as possible.
I think we’re going to accomplish big things this season, but our main focus is to have some fun. I look forward to riding and racing with you, and once we get your deposit I can get your passwords to the team’s site and email to you.
Roman’s Beer Corner
This week’s beer choice from Roman is the Imperial Eclipse Stout by FiftyFifty Brewing. This one seems pretty hard to get.
Brilliant!
Brilliant!
“a Brian breach of any of those rules will be grounds for termination and forfeiture of any team clothing.”
6cycle. Someone had to say it!
I’ve got 99 problems, but a (Brian) Breach ain’t one.
What makes this entry so great is that its closer to the truth than it is to an exaggeration for many of us.
It all sounds reasonable. Someone put in a a lot of time and effort to put the team together and line up sponsors. So there is nothing wrong with expecting something in return.
6Cycles, ReCycled?
This was funny.
Brilliant parody. Some people take themselves WAY too seriously.
Great, as always, Dan
People submit resumes to join a club team?
How is setting out these secret procedures and processes not grounds for termination?
Dammit! Now I have to turn in my team clothing.
Ehhh, go ahead and keep it. Especially the bib shorts.
Think you have just saved a lot of us from the usual round of threatening team e mails
We require a head shot too. I don’t have to explain that one I hope.
Sweetly timed mid-winter truth telling (but what about the team bikes, gasp?)
Someone is trying to sock six cycles.
Bra vo.
So, so true. Gotta love amateur cycling teams run by hyperorganized, 20 and 30-something year old striver types. I think this is more of a NYC thing than anywhere else, honestly. I wonder what beer league kickball team recruitment emails look like?
Way harsh, Tai.
What happens if I get poppped for doping on the 5-boro bike ride?
Turn in your bib shorts
Eat your bib shorts.
Has he made up his mind yet?
A reminder that the New York State Bicycle Racing Association (NYSBRA) Annual Meeting is being held tomorrow, Sunday, at 10 AM in Manhattan.
The annual meeting is being hosted by Matt Vandivort/Lisa Kennish and the Century Road Club Association (CRCA) at 300 East 85th St (Southeast corner of 2nd ave) in the Lobby Meeting Room
All USAC licensed racers in New York State are welcome.
Thanks,
Dieter
Someone please ask for the Lou Maltese doping report
who ran LM? Matt, can you follow up on this?
Race directors and NYSBRA really have nothing to do with the testing and the results. USADA administers all that.
Fantastic piece of satire Dan! It does make me think of a certain team that is part of CRCA. I thought it was only their behavior on the bike that was ridiculous with all the screaming at each other. I guess we have to deal with the frat mentality long after college is over.
NYSBRA announced their innitiative to start testing at races last year so they should at least comment on the status of LM. USADA announces positives before and after LM so what is the holdup?? Is USADA actually in charge? Are they trying to sweep this under the rug?? Or is this in the hands of the DR?
Dieter already responded, but just to reiterate what he said…
NYSBRA provides the funding required for the testing (with financial support from various organizations, including the CRCA)
Then USADA selects the races that they will test at – Lou Maltese was one of three races that USADA tested at last year.
As the race promoter I helped coordinate the logistics for the testing, but once the samples are collected the process is entirely in USADA’s hand. CRCA and NYSBRA have no involvement and thus are in no position to comment.
Any announcement from USADA regarding any potential sanction would most likely be posted here:
http://www.usada.org/press-release/
If you have questions for USADA on the process, here is their contact info:
https://www.usada.org/contact
USADA also runs the “Play Clean Tip Center” here:
https://www.usada.org/playclean
And finally more info on NYSBRA Anti-Doping:
http://www.nysbra.com/about/anti-doping/
USADA will be testing again this year as part of NYSBRA’s anti-doping efforts so hopefully this clarifies the process. If you have any addition questions on the testing feel free to shoot me an email or a message on FB.
MV
I’m stoked Eugene is still racing but what happened with breach?
breach to the beach
That doesn’t clear up anything… No one really cares about the process, they just want an official announcement of who tested positive for what. We already know “unofficially” but an officially word would put LM to a rest.
i think you are missing the point of matt’s post. people here keep asking him and nysbra when the data will be released and matt’s post (one of many like this) was informing them that it’s not up to him, the crca, or nysbra to release that info and (if the process works as it should) none of those organizations has that info. it rests on usada at this point, per the process. so go bug them if you want it released.
Breach went to the Lupus team. Seems like only too many times can you have teammates test positive before you head for greener fields…
If someone tested positive for LM, and if it was official, wouldn’t they publish it like all the other morons?
I love the organization of this team and aspire to be a part of it. Is there any contact information you can provide on where I might submit my resume?
Richard Meeker’s results took USADA 14 months to release due to appeals. They’re not going to release anything until it’s final, and in this alleged case since it presumably allegedly involves foreign racing associations that may add complications to the announcing process. All said a million times already this has nothing to do with NYSBRA, CRCA, or any promoter.
yeah but I wanna know now!!!
You’re always welcome to e-mail and we can discuss this in as much detail as you’d like as its a bit hard to carry on this conversation again and again via an anonymous message board.
I can’t speak for CRCA since I’m not longer on the board, but to be absolutely clear, from my personal perspective there is nothing more that I would like than to have the final outcome of the test results definitively announced.
But as much as you don’t care about the process, there is a process and it’s there for a reason. I think its easy to forget that CRCA and NYSBRA are both small organizations, held together largely by a small group of volunteers who contribute their personal time to the sport. It’s not an easy task and as such neither organization is in any position to singlehandedly run its own testing program and pursue sanctions against athletes. That is why the USADA exists.
And as someone else pointed out, for better or worse, the USADA process can take quite some time with athlete appeals, etc. But based on the lengthening list of amateur athletes that are being sanctioned by USADA (http://www.usada.org/press-release/) I’d like to think that USADA is doing their job.
And with USADA coming back to New York races next year hopefully we’re on the path towards a cleaner sport. If you think there is a better way to go about the process, I’d recommend reaching out to NYSBRA (http://www.nysbra.com/).
Again – feel free to reach out to me via other means, I’ve already spoken with several people about the subject via e-mail and FB and frankly am more inclined to spend the time responding when the conversation isn’t anonymous.
MV
Look for Miguel “pulla” Heredia in the list of sanctioned USADA athletes. He isn’t there even though he was caught doping by USADA in 2005 and served a two year suspension. At the time he was licensed by the DR and it was up to them to sanction him and and they issued the suspension. I don’t know how this relates to any Maltese situation you’re all talking about but maybe this applies and maybe all matters have been adjudicated without USADA or USAC issuing any statements.
On a side note I was surprised that Vandivoort said that he and CRCA had no role after the specimens were taken. Other than providing a place for USADA to work, Vandivorrt should have played no role in taking specimens. Seems like gross violation if he and CRCA played any role in taking samples.
Hopefully this is my last comment on this subject, absent other misguided accusations.
As the race director I assisted with testing logistics, in accordance with very specific USADA guidelines. This included helping USADA locating a testing site, among other tasks.
This did not include actual sample collection which was, as you would expect, conducted by USADA, in accordance with USADA guidelines. If you have questions about that process this site has some detail: http://www.usada.org/collection/
As the first test under NYSBRA’s Race Clean program we took the entire process extremely seriously. It made for a long day for me personally (I left Central Park around 11AM on race morning, after arriving around 4:15AM to help setup) so I take accusations of impropriety seriously.
With that I’m done on this thread. If you have further questions or concerns I think most everyone has my email address.
MV
I think you guys are missing the point. All anyone wants is for someone to follow up with USADA to see if there’s an update. The most appropriate people to follow up would be NYSBRA, CRCA or the director of LM. It was their race which was tested, it would be appropriate for them to follow up given how long this is taking and that people are stimping their feet. We all understand the process at this point, but it would be nice to hear something about it.
If you are so concerned, sack up an make the call to USADA yourself.
Sorry to sound frustrated, but do you really think we haven’t done so?
Throughout this thread we have discussed how there is a process that USADA has to follow to address confidentiality, athlete appeals, etc.
Just because the race promoter (CRCA) or the organization that funded the test (NYSBRA) wants an update doesn’t mean USADA can skip ahead in the process and make an announcement.
As we have discussed thoroughly these things take time – with the Meeker process out west it took more than a year due to legal appeals.
I personally would have loved to have the whole thing resolved the same day as the race. But that’s not how the process works.
If there was a positive at Lou Maltese for better or worse it could take just as long to adjudicate as it did with Meeker.
But hopefully no matter how long the adjudication takes we are achieving the true goal of a cleaner sport.
And hopefully with USADA testing again at 2014 races we continue making progress in the coming year.
If you have additional questions or concerns about the Race Clean program or the testing process I suggest you air them to NYSBRA or USADA directly, rather than via this website.
I’m not a representative of either organization, I’m just doing my best to clarify the process but at this point I don’t think there is any more I can add, at least in this forum. Email me if you want to discuss further.
So what’s your obsession with trying to find out who got busted, taking what substance?
I mean, most of us think we know who it was – there’s also a hint on this thread of emails.
As MV said, the process is out of their hands and I believe they(CRCA and NYSBRA as an organization and individuals volunteering) have better things to do than to follow up on a doping offense – particularly if there was a proper procedure in place by USADA.
If you (and others) are soooooo curious to find out, go contact the organizations yourself and share with us what you find out.
In the meantime, keep riding.
This thread started on a very funny note making fun about local teams. Now it is getting REALLY boring.
Anytime someone in the Pro Tour tests positive, it’s announced within a month, and then a proceeding goes on for sometime where there is some level of transparency.
Here there has been ZERO transparency, no announcement that X tested positive, nor any status on a proceeding. So why the double standard when its the same people (USADA/WADA) administering it? All we have are rumors and assurances that this is “cleaning up the sport” .
Enough with this BS already Matt – tell us who really shot JFK!
And you wonder why it is so hard to get people to run for positions on the CRCA board.
I am willing to bet that 99% of the clowns who are so interested in getting the scoop are Cat4s and 3s who did not even race the guy or gal in question.
Who cares – if he is busted and you placed etc your finishing spot will be adjusted.
@AyoubTubie Disagree. Its important to out and speak against ALL doping regardless. Its not about how it changes results in any one race, its about how it is a cancer that needs to be eradicated by a change in values. This is why we all should care. MV is on the good guys side – that’s why we need to support, not attack him and others who give of their time.
I don’t care if guys I race against are doping. In fact, I am pretty sure lots of guys I race against are doping. Its their problem, not mine.
Obviously I can’t speak for others here. But yes, I was in the race.
Ok heard you.
You also heard it is not CRCA, NYSBRA or MV’s responsibility to officially follow up. So pack up your wet bibs, go home and start writing to USADA. And when you find out let us know.
knows more about whom was busted than he will admit. He is anonymous on this board because he lacks the ball to answer honest questions.
@Rayan Clamp. And, why are you anonymous?
Thanks for all of your hard, thankless work last year. It is much appreciated by many of us.
You owe no explanations to anonymous gripers.
word. the quiet majority do very much appreciate your hard and thankless work. thanks man.
Thanks for everything you’ve done and continue to do for the sport.
I’m behind you, as the outspoken minority.
Rest assured Matt. Eli is behind you.