Bicycle Races Are Coming Your Way

• Tucson Training Camp- Day 4 and 5

  2/25/2009

  

  Welcome to the finale of “CJ’s Desert Porno Training Camp!”

  Coach Roger has definitely been trying to make us all cry, and you’d think that after a hard ride up Mt Lemmon we would be due for a light day. Hells-freakin-no!

  the very next day, we loaded up his car with MORE BIKES THAN I’VE EVER SEEN ON ONE CAR (9). it was pretty pro.

  

  Being as there were 12 of us and two cars, we decided to adopt the “when in Rome” philosophy and a few of us got shoved into the trunk of an SUV like a couple of illegals for the drive out. During the drive, i listened to music and though to myself “I though i would at least make it to 30 before being stuffed in the trunk of a car while listening to Phil Collins…”

  

  We drove out to Benson and parked our cars at the Walmart. our ride had two destinations- one the way out we would go through Tombstone, and then ride out to Bisby, which was about 50 miles out from Benson, then back through Tombstone to Benson.

  

  to get there, we traversed across some beautiful grassland. Everyone kept it steady, and we got some great volume in.

  

  We briefly rolled into Tombstone on the way out to Brisby- as if we were a bunch of modern day cowboys (rendered only marginally gayer by substituting spandex for chaps). The town looks like you would picture it- an old-time cowboy town, with saloons, burlesque dancers, smoke shops, gun shops, and the whole shebang.

  

  We stopped to talk to one of the paid actors- turns out he was in “Raising Arizona”- he was 85 and still acting- he said it was better than being stuck in a nursing home comparing what blood pressure medicine each person was on…

  
  the ride from Tombston to bisby was chock full of false flats and a not-so-fun 4 mile climb in 90+ degree heat. The descent was a 50+mph divebomb down into town. you zoom by an old mineral mine, and swoop under an overpass to get to Bisby- a tiny little hippie town tucked in a valley. The town’s full of potheads and artists, but in a charming way. we stopped by a cafe, and outside some musicians jammed along to Neil Young and Billy Joel Songs.

  

  We stopped back into Tombstone on the way back to sip on some fine Sarsparilla and to snap more embarassing photos of cowboys and dudes in spandex. We walked in on the actors re-creating the O.K. Corral Gunfight, but left before all the PEW PEWing started.

  

  the rest of the 98 mile march was chock full of headwinds. Everyone stuck together and churned through it. We also had to go through a border patrol checkpoint, who wanted to make sure we weren’t smuggling any illegals in our bibs…

  

  As the days have gone on, the sheer volume of the rides has started taking its toll on some of the riders- a couple of the guys have been experiencing acute tendonitis from all the riding. My ankle and its newly healed tendonitis has been holding up. Riding hard, back-to-back days like this really makes you appreciate how important proper recovery is. The combination of cold pool/sauna/and massage really helped a whole lot. maybe i should have a sauna installed in my apartment…

  

  The last day of riding for me consisted of a local group ride known as the “Pistol” ride. We met up with a group of locals right next to the University of Arizona and followed them. eventually we were led to this little state park that had a beautiful 9 mile loop in it. since you had to pay to get in, there were barely any cars. The roads were beautifully paved, and with the exception of a minor 3/4 mi climb, the whole loop consisted of coaster-like-rollers and tight, swoopy turns. it was so much fun to ride because you could keep your momentum up when coming over the rollers and really hit the little turns perfectly. the only problem was the local wildlife- tons of Jackrabbits and jackalopes were hopping across the roads- i almost had to bunny hop one or two of them…

  after a loop in the park we kept going, and traded off 25-30mph pulls until we hit about 60 mi. we then stopped at a gas station for a few mexican cokes before heading back home, finishing the ride at about 75 mi. If you’re not familiar with mexican coke- its made with real sugar instead of corn syrup, and tastes so much better. they also still come in glass bottles, in case you get in a bar fight at the local Chuck-e-Cheese.

  

  If you’re wondering what I did for fun when i wasn’t riding, don’t wonder too hard- we were all too tired to do anything other than eat, sleep, and sit in the sauna. I did make one exception, however. I just LOVE reading high quality pieces of cycling-related journalism! especially when they have such good looking models…

  

  Well, that concludes me three-part-tale of rubbing in the fact that i enjoyed a week full of awesome weather and riding- I’m sure that won’t result in me getting put into the curb at the next park race…

  If it’s any consolation (and to exhibit the sense of humor karma has), I left my wallet on the plane while flying back, got a lovely little stomach bug, had my bike delivered to my teammate’s address, and was greeted with 14 hrs/day of work since i’ve been back. It’s so hard being this awesome!

  On Thursday I’m packing up and heading to New Orleans with my teammate Tim Rogers to once again tackle the Rouge Roubaix. I went to training camp to build up for this race, and as long as my digestive system stops trying to recreate a German Porno in the toilet bowl, I’m hoping to kill it there. Next stop, crawfish and Roubaix!

  

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