Section head text.
Excuses Excuses
Taking the current atmosphere in cycling into account, it seems that the whiney nature of cyclists has been exposed to the world. We all seem to have have an endless list of excuses for poor performances: “I was boxed in, I was marked, no one would work, I was drunk, etc.”
What’s your favorite excuse?
I just didn’t have the "legs" today
your leadout wasn’t fast enough
If all these idiots weren’t in front of me.
Or it was the lab. I don’t know where the pee goes.
‘I just didn’t have the "legs" today’
That is not a bad excuse, that is honesty. You rarely hear guys say that. It is always someone elses fault.
Ever since i ripped that patch off my balls all i want to do is either sit in the pack….. or TT.
"The sprint was to sketchy" or better yet "Some freaking truck was in the roadway on catspaw hill" Well that is actually true.
Ray
I suck at 6 a.m. I can’t explain it, it’s just true.
"The marshal directed me the wrong way" (on the fifth lap of a race).
My brakes were rubbing since the top of the Galibier
The radios weren’t working
I thought the line was closer (when you started your sprint too soon, and then got Zabel’d)
I thought the line was further away (when you started your sprint after everybody else was over the line)
JFT did we get radios? Cause that would be the reason I did not hear you when you told me to sprint.
"I was trying to avoid Burrowes bike while he was throwing it from side to side like a wet noodle."
I had sex this morning..and it sapped me of my strength!
I didn’t have sex this morning, and my concentration is shot.
James Joseph crashed me trying to get 5th place and the 2 points and $1.50 that comes with it.
"I was feeling good in the pack, but when we hit the climb my leg went flat!"
my shoulders are too broad to deal with the wind at floyd.
i’m so wreaked from my ride up mount evans sunday, and mid-week intervals that i can’t come up with any good examples. check me later.
I did not ride my bike much last week, month, decade
i had a flat
I was drunk. Seriously.
"Everybody else in the break seemed so nice, I worked really hard to help them win but I was really surprised and kind of hurt when they attacked and dropped me. I thought those guys were my friends!"
boxed in = not strong enough
nobody would work with me
I normally ride at 140psi. Today I rode I 110 so I felt like I was riding thru mud.
My crank came loose.
My testosterone ball patch ripped off mid sprint..
I was gasping for air going into the boat house and then suddenly someone ripped one. Nothing like inhaling a lung full of ass air before the final sprint.
Got to smoke chronic, every single day
Roger A. was killing everyone in the break.
Didn’t know the Chinese internet EPO was no good.
I changed my cleats the night before.
Damn Mexican food.
I blame the rap music.
Finally, the radios just don’t work.
somebody put lactic acid in my waterbottle.
my saddle was a hair too high
I could shift into my 11 cog
I suck.
I didn’t sleep. Stayed up all night partying, put on my cycling gear, and showed up without enough time to warm-up. Why do races have to start at 6am anyway? It’s effing mad!!!
Lance put synthetic testosterone into my 68th water bottle.
James Joseph crashed me.
I could have taken it, but I’m peaking for Bear.
If the line was 10m closer I would’ve won
I didn’t know it was the last lap
And everybody else is better then me
got spooked by the sound of the crash behind me
I got slowed down so much from riding on the grass after passing on the inside…
Didn’t you see that gigantic RAT crossing the road at 150 meters from the line?! "–I brake for animals–"
The Moon was in the 2nd house of virgo and I’m at my best when it’s in aligned with saturn.
It’s hurts when I pedal.
Voigt stared me down at the start.
Wasn’t a good idea to "Ride on the grass" an hour before the start.
My biggest fear is success
I needed more cowbell!
That’s it. I’m actually out of excuses.
Edita had some stuff for me in the trunk of her car but I haven’t heard from her in ages…
my family physician, dr. fuentes, wasn’t available to attend…
wife cut down my hours in the saddle for hours in the ‘saddle’
he didn’t lead me out fast enough!
I have been busy setting up shop, so I don’t think I’ll be racing next two years…
My ball patches kept chafing.
The race wasn’t long or hard enough.
My teammate chased me down. Twice.
epo is too expensive
I have my mother’s thighs
i was the only non-dominican in the race..
Screw this vegan stuff…I need a steak
i worked too hard on lap 1
i’m too stupid to race
my bottom bracket feels loose.
SCHMALZ!!!
i’ve only been riding endurance
Ok Ok I got it!"I live in NYC"!!!!!!!
I burned 6 "matches" and I didn’t get to even inhale..
I thought there was a break up the road.
O’Malley told me he felt good.
O’Malley crashed me.
No moron…
I burned six matches and I didn’t even fart
I didn’t go for the win at Prospect because nyvelocity.com wasn’t covering the race.
I didn’t go for the win at Prospect since only NYVC is covering the race. Oh and I suck…that too.
I showed up at Prospect but left when I didn’t see any nyvc photographers. If I’m not going to be featured in the slide show, why bother?
IT’S THE SAME CONSPIRACY THAT’S BEEN HOUNDING ME SINCE THE ’80s WHEN THOSE SONY MOTHEREFFERS WERE OUT TO GET ME.
CASE CLOSED!
my teammates chased me down.
I used gatoraid instead of poweraid
I didn’t wax my bike
my doctor says I have a viral infection, I just wish he would tell me
i suck.
I dunno…maybe they should have put cones on that huge rut that brought me down at Christiana, 1/2 lap before I was set to gas ’em. Same thing for those two morons at Poughkeepsie throwing themselves to the ground in front of me with 3.5 to go.
Or maybe…if bonehead sprinters would learn to come around without body-slamming my front wheel, as happened two days in a row, six weeks ago.
Shit happens. Take a few words of wisdom from horseracing, a sport with some two centuries more experience: "There’s a thousand ways to lose a race and only one (or a few) to win it." There will always be impediments and excuses…>>ahem<<, ‘reasons’ for not winning or placing well, in bicycle racing.
I went to put that patch on my balls, and then I realized I dont HAVE any balls…
I went to put that patch on my balls, and then I realized I dont HAVE any balls…