On the scale of sensitivity to cold in the extremities from “not very sensitive” (i.e. Arctic explorers, members of polar bear clubs and Green Bay Packers fans) to “extremely sensitive” (everyone’s grandmother, Arizonians and Miami Dolphins fans), I fall somewhere in the “slight wuss” section of cold sensitivity, right near the Carolina Panthers fan section of the spectrum. I feel this sensitivity in my hands and feet—my extremities just get colder quicker—it’s as simple as that. I’m not sure why I feel cold more than others (I don’t have any vascular problems or Raynaud’s phenomenon, again, I am just a wuss), but I do. This means that I am very selective about which gloves I wear as I pedal my way through the winter. I have honed my hand wear selections down to the 5 degree differences in temperature. I begin wearing fingered gloves at 60 degrees and change which gloves I wear as the temperature drops. This may seem a bit excessive, but there’s nothing more irritating than cold hands on a ride (well, cold feet are annoying also, but that’s a topic for another day).

My criteria for gloves are pretty straightforward: comfort, durability and warmth. It’s pretty hard to find an uncomfortable glove in this day and age, so all gloves usually pass this test. Durability is a key factor in the search for hand warmth, because there’s nothing more sad than having to finally throw out a worn out pair of gloves that were the perfect companions in 45-35 degree weather—it’s like losing a friend—a friend who stops by with six packs on a regular basis. The final and most important factor in glove assessment is warmth. Gloves are meant to be warm. This is an obvious statement, but it needs to be reiterated—warm gloves, good.

I have no fewer than twenty pairs of gloves in my arsenal, but only six pairs have made it to the top, and here they are, in descending temperature order. (Remember, this temperature scale is calibrated to my wuss hands, you may be able to do 5-10 degrees lower than what this scale represents)

60 – 55 degrees Gore Bike Wear Universal Gloves $29.99

These are the gloves I toss on when i just need to take the edge off. They have grippy stuff on the palms and fingers, which makes them pretty durable, and they look pretty, which means a lot to a shallow person like me. They have durability issues though, as one of my gloves has split seams from being taken on and off my sweaty palms during a ride. This is a problem I have had with many lightweight full-fingered gloves, their lightweight-ness can translate to fragility, and that’s a shame because there are pretty gloves. I shall miss them.

55 – 50 degrees Firm Grip High Dex Gloves $9.88 for a pack of three

I go to the Home Depot often. Many times I am there shopping for things I need to maintain my home, but other times I just go there to dream, to touch routers and to fantasize that I could operate a router without removing any fingers. On one of my dream trips to Home Depot, I came upon the Firm Grip High Dex Gloves, and I thought I had died and gone to the light. I had found spandex work gloves with leather palms and they were under $10, FOR A THREE PACK! I use theses glove all the time, and they are nearly indestructible. They aren’t cycling specific of course, they aren’t especially windproof, and there’s no “nose wiping” area on the thumbs, but I will say again, $10, FOR A THREE PACK. The black and grey set are the way to go if you’re bike outfits aren’t yellow or red, but who’s complaining about a $4 set of gloves?

50 – 45 degrees Gore Bike Wear Power Windstopper Soft Shell Gloves $55.99

I can’t seem to figure these gloves out, firstly, the black version of the glove has red panels on the fingers, which in my mind makes it a red glove, but they also make a red glove that has even more redness added to it. WHY ARE YOU TORTURING ME GORE BIKE WEAR?! Everyone knows that all black is a basic requirement for cycling gloves, because some team’s kit won’t match black with red accents. YOU’RE MAKING ME WEAR AN ACCESSORY THAT DOESN’T MATCH!! I cannot stress enough how much this irks me. That being said, these gloves have durable palm things and (bless them) a terry cloth nose wiping thumb section—I am a sucker for a nose wiping section. These gloves also start out cold, but you have to have faith. Keep moving, and after a while your hands will be nice and warm, BUT THEY WILL STILL HAVE RED PANELS!

45 – 40 degrees Louis Garneau LG Shield gloves (I think) $54.99

Can we be honest for a moment here? Who would you rather buy warm gloves from, a Canadian or someone from another country? You’d choose a Canadian, wouldn’t you? Why would you choose a Canadian? Because Canada’s a cold place, and Canadians can test their gloves by sticking their hands out the window. They have opportunities for R&D right outside their doors, and this means they make a mean glove. I have last year’s version of this glove, so I think the link above is for this year’s version. I love these gloves. I rely on these gloves. I wear them so often that they have developed that permanent “hockey equipment stank” (those who have smell hockey gloves know what I’m talking about). One of the gloves is coming apart at the seam on the right index finger and that makes me sad. When these gloves wear out, I will give them a viking funeral.

40 – 35 degrees Louis Garneau Lobster Gloves $64.99

Now that we’re down to the more serious temperatures, we are back to Canada again. These are my second favorite set of warm gloves behind the Canadian mitts above. These gloves are going on their third year and are holding up like the champions of warmth that they are. Lobster gloves might take some getting used to, but they are worth the effort. These gloves are sent from heaven, but if you want to live through hell, try washing them and then trying to force your fingers back into their rightful places inside the gloves. Re-fingering lobster gloves after a washing is God’s revenge for the warmth they bring, but hey, no one said life was fair.

35 and below Gordini Aquabloc Insulated Mitts $19.99

Congratulations, you’ve decided to head out in any soft of weather no matter how cold or miserable. You are a true warrior and will undoubtedly casually mention the temperature in your Strava post because true warriors love to humble brag. You will need to keep your hands from falling off. You will need the big guns—mittens. There seems to be a divide in the bike world between anti- and pro-mitten factions, with the anti-mitten faction raising concerns about the loss of maneuverability involved. This is a concern, but this can be overcome with practice. You get used to it, and I haven’t found a substantial loss of control when riding with mittens, and this is vital because mittens are the promised land of digital warmth. Because all of your fingers are in the same fuzzy party room, the warmth they emit pools to keep everything warm. I can wear mittens in 30 degree temperatures and have my fingers sweat—it’s glorious. I can still shift and brake. These mittens from Campmor are my last resort—the big guns. If I’m going out in sub 25 degree weather (because life is pain), I’ll add a chemical hand warmer pack and I’m good down to approximately absolute zero.