Usually I begin my annual training log with a review of the last year’s racing and then decide whether I will continue to race for another year, but this just may be the Wheat Thins talking here, this year’s decision to continue racing feels like a fait accompli (which is French for, "Yes, Andy will always finish second in the Tour"). I felt like I had a great year last year, even though I didn’t win anything (in 2010 I won the overall in the category 3/4 race at FBF, but I’m sure you already knew that), but I did have some lovely racing moments; and those moments are enough to warrant shoving myself into lycra and prancing all about the public spaces of New York and New Jersey again (plus, I really love to prance).

This year’s log will have some new features, most notably among them is the fact that I have a sponsor. Yes, I’ve sold out! Strava has agreed to not charge me to use their lovely training software, so I will be uploading my (outdoor) data for the world to see. Also new this year is my Val Kilmer based weight control/shaming infographic. In years past I’ve used rodents and marsupials to display my weight gain or loss, and that went very well, but with my new found bankability, I decided it was time to move up to a human weight infometric (I just made that word up!).

I don’t mean to pick on Val Kilmer by using his descent into rotundity as a graph for weight gain. I’m trying to help Val here. My Val-o-meter is meant to inspire and/or shame Val in much the same way it’s meant to inspire me to maintain an acceptable girth. I only want Val to be all he can be, and while a return to the "oily Iceman playing a very masculine game of volleyball with Tom Cruise" physique may be out of his reach, perhaps being used as a scale for pendulous weight fluctuations might get him into a Jazzercise class.

So I dedicate this training season to Val Kilmer in the hope that I inspire him through Spandex to channel his inner Iceman. It’s a mission of love really.

Monday

I’m at a technological crossroads. I’m using Strava, which is a very high tech way to tell the world you’ve ridden 18.6 miles at 16.4 mph, but I’m also still very much attached to my wired Power Tap unit. Since my Tap is still wired, there’s no way (that I know of) to upload the data to Strava, so I must use my iphone to run Strava while I simultaneously use my Power Tap to collect my power and heart rate data. This is a situation akin to simultaneously using Photoshop and Mac Paint to put a cat’s head onto the body of an ice dancer (research has shown that putting the words "cat" and "ice dancer" together on a web page will make the internet explode with excitement—I know web things, that’s why Stava loves me).

I, of course, blame Jonathan Vaugthers. As Garmin’s be-turtle-necked mascot, he’s the reason why I’m riding around with a Betamax for a rear wheel. If only he were able to get Garmin to finally complete (that means, make it for sale, not just parade it around Interbike) the power pedal thingy, I would be able sell a superfluous organ and upgrade to that power measuring device. Get on it JV! 

Tuesday

Today was my first foray into the basement for my training log. I’ve actually done basement rides already, but for the purposes of drama and fine literature, let’s just say this is my first trainer ride. I rode My Lemond Revolution, and it’s still delightful. I enjoy the Revolution immensely and would recommend that anyone who’s looking at trainers get one. Also helping with my subterranean panting was the fact that we’ve upgraded our Direct TV system, and I can get DVR program on the tiny television in my basement pedaling hovel. This is a momentous development in my training. As it frees me from having to watch reruns of Modern Marvels about cadmium, not that I don’t like cadmium, but how much smelting can you watch?

And speaking of extracting ore, I did a set of 20/10s today to keep the old smelter percolating. By way of explanation, 20/10s are high intensity intervals. You do 20 seconds as hard as you can and take 10 seconds off, then repeat that vile process 8 times. They are disgusting, but thankfully over quickly, and that’s why I enjoy having them in my satchel of physical exertion tricks.

Wednesday

I enjoy when riders are interviewed and they talk about the "sensations" they are feeling from their legs. I’m not sure if there’s a slightly different perception towards the usage of the term sensation in other languages or if they are just more adept at English than everyone in say, Wyoming is, but I love it when riders refer to the sensations coming from their legs. It’s an evocative use of a charming word.

I also had sensations coming from my legs today and they were, for the most part, awful. I blame a late night and bock beer (recommended to me by a guy who looked like Jesus for drinking with a guy who looked like Kid Rock) for these sensations. And since I was stuck in a fugue of bad sensations, I did not climb Skyline Drive. Nor did I exert myself in an extra manner whatsoever. I simply pedaled along until my fugue dissipated and my sensation upgraded to ghastly.

If you look closely on the map below you can see where I turned away from the climb I was supposed to do. 

Thursday

Today was a sojourn up to interval country to do a set of two 5 minute threshold intervals. I like to keep doing intensity all year long, as it helps maintain my power as an older person. Plus, like all nutcase cyclists, I don’t feel good unless I’m doing terrible things to myself. I dispatched my self-immolation with joy, and had a quite pleasant day on my bike. I also found that riding while not feeling the effects of Jesus Bock is much nicer than the converse. Who knew?

The Strava map below will show the location of interval country, feel free to stop by and visit. The intervals also have their own graphs, although my second interval doesn’t really deserve it. Again, I blame JV.