Bicycle Races Are Coming Your Way

• The Perfect CXtorm

  10/3/2009

  

  I’m hangin‘ out in the motel room with Marco right now- after a long, muddy, awesome Day 1 at the Gloucester Gran Prix. We loaded up the Toga! Van yesterday afternoon and headed up to MA. So far the race has been the complete opposite of last year. 2208 was a sunny, gorgeous day with nice, dry conditions. Today was a muddy slopfest that would bring a tear to any Belgian’s eye. Being the smartypants that i am, I had forgotten my rain jacket at home. We all ended up going to a fisherman’s store where i bought a rainsuit that made me look like the Gordon’s Fisherman…

  Racing as a cat 3 at Gloucester is an interesting experience; 120+ people were registered, and callups to the front line are by order of registration. Needless to say, pre-reg is a furiously fast endeavor for those who take the race seriously. most of the field fills up in the first 20 minutes. I was a bit lackadaisical in signing up (by 2 hours) and ended up in the 94th spot…

  

  That automatically removes the pressure of the race. You’re out to beat your friends and humiliate them by passing then in the mud and on the straight sections. I’m very happy for all of my friends who managed to do that to me. PS-guys, go f*ck yourselves!
   

  
   

  The weather for the day was in the 50’s and raining. i made sure to bring all of my embrocations, and ended up going with mad alchemy, and tons of it. That stuff is orange, and putting it on makes you look like you just got out of the fake’n’bake booth. that being said, its delightfully greasy and warm, and water beads right off of it. hoooray for spicy grease!
   

  

  We got to watch the Masters 35+ Men’s race right before ours. Watching Roger, Johnny Bold, and the Gotham Guys duke it out on the muddy battlefield is a fun sight. Here’s a most excellent shot of a midair collision between Chris Long and some farthead who doesn’t know how to handle his bike:

  

  As i lined up in the 20th row back, i knew what to expect; all 125 of us were going to hit the first half of the lap together, including the horrifically steep and muddy run-up. those who had shoes without toespikes were going to hate themselves. This has been my first season running tubulars and i couldn’t have been happier with that. i rocked some challenge grifo’s with about 35 psi for this race and they were pretty dialed-in. I think i’m going to switch to a Challenge Fango in the back though, as the rear tubular is a bit old and i could always use more traction on the backside…

  It’s days like today that i love my team’s white kits: nothing says "euro," "i’m and idiot," or "i have a great cleaning lady" like wearing a bright white kit o the muddiest of days.
   

  
   

  So it goes without saying- the slop was thick, but mostly rideable. I went back and forth trading blows with my friends and crossresults.net nemesises. for ONCE i didn’t wipe out! I would also love to take this moment to state that putting those barriers on an uphill incline is a total pain in the ass for those of us who have short hobbit legs.

  These muddy races completely sap your energy around the half-way mark; especially when you don’t have a clean pit bike to hop on. the mud accumulates and bogs you down (as if i needed to be any heavier)- your back tire frequently slips out when pedaling up inclines, and you’re forced to trudge up muddy rises that would otherwise be a piece of cake. Every muscle in your body hurts. you start to lose your finesse as your arms and lower back get fatigued from all the pounding (save your jokes). Somehow, though, it’s still some of the most fun you’ll have on a bike…

  I got pulled a lap early but wasn’t lapped- I spent the next few minutes wandering around like an out-of-breath hobo before heading off to get hosed off like the muddy swine the i resemble.
   

  

  after getting cleaned up and donning the rain gear, i made a b-line to the beer tent. My purpose was two-fold: drink awesome beer and contribute to CX Magazine’s live coverage of the Elite Men’s race. I was twitterin‘ so hard i think Lance may have noticed. If you didn’t follow the coverage, all you have to know is that Jonathan Page tore everyone a new poopyhole (Lolz). The Kona Mafia (Trebon, Wicks) weren’t Present, so Jamie Driscoll, Tim Johnson, and Chris Jones were the only guys even remotely close to him. By remotely close, i mean 1:30 back…

  It was also great too see our very own Andrew Crooks hold his own in the elite race. I really think this race benefitted his MTB background- awesome job Andrew!  Adn this goes without saying, but Thanks to Marco Quezada for all of the Awesome Photos!
   

  

  Time for sleep. Day 2 tomorrow! and before you go, here’s a photo of Jason Parkin mounting his bike as if it were some crazy-assed sex toy (DAYUM!)
   

  

   

   

   

  

  

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