Stage 7
Today is the “Race of truth†or in watching terms, the “Race of tedium.†Poisonously boring, these time trials. Sure, they shake up the GC, but God Almighty, they make for a long TV day, especially when you’re trying to fight off a three-year-old who wants to watch “Little Einsteins†on the TIVO. But for the moment, daddy wins out, and men in lycra it is!
Robbie Ventura (not the baseball player), explains how Floyd has to look between his thumbs in his yellow belt TT position to see where he’s going. I think Floyd will win today; the biggest danger would be some rain making the course hard to negotiate while steering with his freakin’ elbows.
I also like checking out the TT equipment, and the discrepancies in carbon allocation between leaders and the other guys. I anticipate Commesso riding on a banana seat today.
Mayo TT-ing like a climber – painfully. Cuengo doing the same.
Yep, this is the guy commenting on the TT. Clearly an expert.
Trek TT bike spot. Zzzzzzzz…
Simoni about to start – let the time losses begin!
Mayo finishing – slowly. About two minutes down so far. See you in the mountains.
Levi starts his long program. Watch out for the Russian judge, he is very particular about positioning.
Why don’t they require Saunier to not wear yellow? Can’t we go back to the days when yellow teams like Once had to go pink for the Tour?
Sastre has top time so far at the time check, that time will have the shelf life of warm beef.
Levi is riding his “Specialized†– special stickers?
Julich crashes – oof! Ribs, meet curb. Would it be rude to say it seems like old times? Looks pretty bad. He’s out.
Kloden has the “one†number for T-Mobile because someone has to.
Millar about start – his zipper is open – that should cost him about 56 seconds.
Either the clocks are of or Levi is riding a Razzy-esque TT.
Here goes Moreau, the partisan French crowd cheers as he begins his assault on 10th place in earnest.
We now pause the TIVO action to take a trip to Graydon Pool.
Back from the pool with a good start on my summer sunburn. Here’s the ratio: schmalz is to sun as fork is to microwave.
Floyd starts as we are trying to figure out whether Levi is having the worst TT of all time.
Menchov finishing, just gets best time. Kloden first at a checkpoint. I’m pretending this is gripping information.
Rogers snags a free power gel from a lovely lady. Thor about to start – SMASH! I doubt he’ll go full gas today.
George about to start, can his Oakley Jackets be aero? Not like he can take them off anyway…
The Boner is going to start, might just as well get it over with.
French TV insists on showing Moreau, because, well, he’s French.
Hincapie looks ridiculously skinny. Like an anorexic dragon fly. His first time check should tell the story.
Moreau comes though at EIGHTH! Rejoice France!
Levi at the second checkpoint, VDV has just passed him. Bad news. Does he have the dreaded “stomach ache?â€
Floyd might have a flat. This after having a flat for the prologue. Hmm, how quickly can you fire your tire supplier?
More Moreau, like we care…
Floyd second best at the time check. His tires don’t look flat.
They’re showing Thor SMASH! He looks like a bull humping a steak on his TT bike.
Ugh! This is so dull I’m hitting the fast forward on the TIVO, scanning for crashes or Toto.
Briske 29 seconds down at the check. Still no crashes, I’m in NASCAR mode here, just looking for carnage.
George about to catch the SMASH!
VDV finishing 16th. A man who when interviewed on this site, called Salvatore Commesso “greasy and fat.†Man crush commencing in 3, 2, 1…
Levi does a Rasmussen on the stage. Not pretty.
Millar gunning for the top 40.
Moreau checking in at 13th. Some things don’t change.
Floyd changed bikes and is still kicking it.
Riders finishing, trying to stay awake.
Floyd at the second check, second best time. So, I guess they have two of those bikes with the goofy position for him.
Briske finishing. 7th place. I’ll file that under “mmm-kay.â€
George about 2 minutes off of the best time at the time check.
Moreau finishing, hell have to dig deep to dance with 10th place. NINTH place! Can he hold it?!
Cadel Evans eighth place, plus Rogers in ninth knocking Moreau out of 10th. Tragedy! Normalcy!
Fast forwarding to Floyd. He finishes second with his BM position.
Here comes Salvodelli, racing for the Disco leadership. 18th.
George finishing, let’s see who will lead Disco. 23rd – I guess that settles it.
Thor finishing – saving the SMASH for other days.
Just sprinters left to finish, nothing left to see here.
Gontchar wins, gets yellow. The expiration date on that jersey is “first mountain.â€
Um, so OLN is reporting that the UCI made Floyd change his handlebar position right before the TT, weakening his bars – causing them to crack or something. If you scan back to the Tour day schmalz preview I joked that the UCI would make Floyd change his position. Joking, UCI! It’s called “irony.†So, in addition to changing the OLN crawl and inventing the internet, I now can read the UCI’s mind. Right now, I’m reading that they are drunk on champagne and want to know where the girls are…
I think Commesso has a couple of stage wins – I remember a two-up break a few years back where he also cat-n-moused the other guy at low speed and blew by him at the line. What can you say – I think he has a track background and knows how to win a match sprint.
Sorry Jon, I should have read Schmaltz first.
Continue to hail Schmalz’s virility.
Any thoughts on Vino’s Kazahk national champ kit? What color blue is that? I dare any local team to change to that blue and yellow color scheme!
Commesso’s a coke-loving (with the drug suspension to prove it), wheel sucking clown, who’s wins have all come at the expense of others in breaks. No one who has been in a break with him has had nice things to say.
Vino’s light blue Kazahk kit is hard to stomach, but once you see it, it’s hard to miss. Unlike the combo Disco/Quick Step clones. So, when they formed the new Kazahkstan (sp) republic, were all the good flag color taken?
My lord, that flag looks like it was made from Word clip art.
I remember a match sprint situation with Commesso taking someone other than Vino – maybe same scenario in another Tour – 2000? 2001? No Tour history freaks out there ?
BTW, Vino is the man and my chief hope for keeping this race interesting.
1999 Tour stage 13, he snaked a stage from Serpellini from the break. This is the only way he ever wins. His 2 Italian Champs included.
For the record, I love Vino. And I’m sure he’s proud to be wearing that horrible looking kit. Not like jaan kirsipuu’s is much better–although purple is at least the color of royalty.
By the way, Schmalz, I assume “Salvatore” is on the short list of baby names if No. 2 is a boy.
Shmalz, you are an IDIOT!!!! You have just made such coments about the country that you know so little or none at all. Continue saying this and you better watch yourself… You never know who will be next to your wheel to take you down… Careful, ’cause that same eagle could strike you — broken frames, wheels and BONES!!! you don’t want that, do you?
Shot your mouth for once, plaese!!!!
“boisya svoei teni!” — be affraid of your own shadow!!!
I mock the flag, not the country. In fact, Kazakhstan is my favorite central-Asian former Soviet Republic. I also appreciate its natural resources such as: major deposits of petroleum, natural gas, coal, iron ore, manganese, chrome ore, nickel, cobalt, copper, molybdenum, lead, zinc, bauxite, gold, and uranium, just mention a few.
Free Vino from the clutches of T-Mobile!
"Anorexic dragon fly"? "Bull humping a steak"? This is a classic.
Gonchar is no chump in the Mtns. Putting a min. on’em can be done but with a strong T-Mo squad supporting, It’ll take some doing.
Actually the champagne drunk scoping for chicks right now is me. UCI is one brainwave over.
kate moss’s riblettes are jealous as hell, but george does look a little on the emaciated side. late in the Tour body fat is a luxury, sure, but it’s early and he’s only going to get skinner. Guess he’s bought into that whole power-to-weight ratio thing big time, but should guys that tall be that skinny? isn’t there a some sort of structural risk going on there.
kate moss’s riblettes are jealous as hell, but george does look a little on the emaciated side. late in the Tour body fat is a luxury, sure, but it’s early and he’s only going to get skinner. Guess he’s bought into that whole power-to-weight ratio thing big time, but should guys that tall be that skinny? isn’t there a some sort of structural risk going on there.
Yeah, like I said, some serious hoodoo going on. Honchar over a minute faster than everyone else?! Oh, and I like the bike swap by Landis–thanks UCI! A bit surprised by some of the numbers. Zabriskie off pace, Georgie nowhere and Levi and Julich both imploding. Looks like the team to watch is T-Mobil with 4 in the top 10.
Nice ride by Lattanzi for fifth in p-1-2-3. Badger, Riss and some other locals were up there in the masters. Badger and maybe Tony Taylor placed in both the masters and p-1-2-3 — that’s 70 miles of critting….
Such a fun course and great atmosphere. Some harsh manhole covers on the back strecth but definitely my new favorite crit. Plus the back hill lets you move up in the pack if necessary. Great event and just a cool atmosphere. I cant wait for next year.
Read tody that Hilary Swank is cutting her hair off again. Man, they’re really moving fast on ‘The Linus Gerdemann Story’
i disagree. And Schmalz smells.
Naugatuck crit was a blast today with great organization, a great course and lots go good racers. Definitely worth a look next year. Kind of like a more technical Bethel Course.
Whoops, fruedian slip; meant “How’s that?”
Since nobody else is throwin’ ya a bone, I’ll chime in with my dailey “Great job with the Tdf coverage,Schmalz.” Ho’s that?