As the Toto Turns 269

Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:02pm by Andy Shen

OMG there was a full confession!

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By: Leon Chainline
Mon, 07/07/2014 - 6:12pm

Wait a minute, are you sure the NJBA doesn't run this race?

By: Amyfge
Mon, 07/07/2014 - 12:26pm

TOTOs have always been my favorite. I love the way you present the news and incidents related to racing in comic way. This time’s TOTO regarding the confessions was interesting. Thanks a lot for sharing this TOTO. Please keep on sharing. click here

I think a better question is
By: Michele Uptube
Mon, 02/04/2013 - 3:38pm

I think a better question is what sport at the highest level DOESN'T have doping, or even at amateur levels. Let's be realistic, it's human nature to cheat, not only in sports, but in life, work, etc...

football and doping
By: Quentin Internal Routing
Mon, 02/04/2013 - 2:40pm

6 years of systematic doping in spanish premier league club linked to Fuentes

By: take dat
Sat, 01/26/2013 - 3:11pm

me too!!

B A A S Caps
By: Seppe Egopower
Sat, 01/26/2013 - 2:46pm

Did I read that you guys were selling them? I'd like two please. Seriously.

...this just in...
By: bikesoverthemoon
Wed, 01/23/2013 - 11:21pm

...lance armstrong is thought to be suffering from 'stockholm syndrome' after his "confession" (bwahaha) to oprah winfrey...

...sez lance - "i wanna marry that woman & help her get that weight thing under control...besides, we're two of the biggest, savviest stars in the infotainment biz..."...

...can you feel the love, bgw...

Phila Organizers owe city $321K
By: Nathan Wave Ring
Wed, 01/23/2013 - 9:23pm

This is what I'm talking about. This is John Eustice's clan.

These are the same people who were kicked out of the City of San Francisco for not paying their bills (research it yourself on Google SFGate).

Birds of a feather!

Philadelphia is such a loser city that they are actually trying to help these crooks!


By: Big Tex
Wed, 01/23/2013 - 7:46pm

Love the fat suit shot of Tyra Banks . . .

PS - Lance is innocent, damn it! Opps, did he confess already?

Frankie has to stay employed?
By: Andy Shen
Wed, 01/23/2013 - 6:30pm

Frankie has to stay employed?

Question for Andy, or Betsy if she's watching
By: Phil Meallup
Wed, 01/23/2013 - 6:11pm

Lance screwed over Frankie Andreu yet it seems for the most part that Betsy is the outspoken one. Why is she doing most of the talking and why not Frankie himself?

By: Quentin Internal Routing
Wed, 01/23/2013 - 6:02pm

Thomas Dekker claims that he will be telling the full story about his doping, his enablers and everyone else he has seen with dope including the names on the plus 150 bags of blood, his doc Mr Fuentes, who he has seen 5 times, had seen. The list of names includes Ivan Basso, Alejandro Valverde and of course Alberto Contador. It will include not only names, but data en details as well. He will confessing will to the Dutch doping authority which is run by Herman Ram.

Lance ist Kaupt
By: Rinieri O-Ring
Tue, 01/22/2013 - 10:22pm


Goldman Sachs, Lance Armstrong and John Eustice
By: Goldman Sachs
Tue, 01/22/2013 - 4:41pm

For Lance Armstrong and John Eustice

Train right
By: Adam Plug
Tue, 01/22/2013 - 1:02am
By: Hot tubE
Mon, 01/21/2013 - 4:41pm

Carmichael was not Armstrong's coach for the tdf. That was a business relationship to grow Carmichael's company while paying licensing fees to Armstrong. I'm pretty sure Ferarri was Lance's coach every year he raced pro. Maybe Carmichael was his coach at one time many many years ago.

Armstrong had the chance to
By: Dr. Phil
Sun, 01/20/2013 - 10:50pm

Armstrong had the chance to father a child with Kate Hudson, Sheryl Crow, and Ashley Olsen, but he didn't.

He chose Safesexstrong!

Armstrong had the chance to
By: Victor Biopace
Sun, 01/20/2013 - 10:11pm

Armstrong had the chance to live honest, instead he chose to lie strong!

All the other kids
By: Monorchid Conconi
Sun, 01/20/2013 - 9:09pm

Lance has got a quick hand.
He'll look around the room,
he wont tell you his plan.
He's got a rolled cigarette
hanging out his mouth.
He's a cowboy kid.


what about carmichael? i bet
By: Salvestro Threadlock
Sun, 01/20/2013 - 6:43pm

what about carmichael?

i bet he was the actual source of all drugs for pharmstrong.


By: Quentin Internal Routing
Sun, 01/20/2013 - 5:42pm

Just a couple of names of Rabo cyclist that came 'clean' over the last few days. Danny Nelissen, Mark Lotz, Thomas Dekker. Many others have already confessed they worked with peds dealer Stefan Matschiner (Humanplasma)including Michael Boogerd, and most likely Joost Posthuma and Pieter Weening. Matschinger was according to Rudy Pevenage, Jan Ullrich ex manager, the one to go to if you could not get Dr Fuentes to work with you. Erik Dekker was not aloud to start because of a 52% hematocrit level during UCI World Championship in Verona (1999). Rory Sutherland got a 9 month ban for using Clomiphene in 2006. Rabobank suspended Carlos Barredo because of internal (doping) violations -a doping team with doping ethics? Dennis Menchov worked for years together with Ferrari. Levi Leipheimer admitted he used doping during his Rabo years. This is just a start the list goes on and on..

Now I know why Rabobank has
By: Amine Bottle
Sun, 01/20/2013 - 2:51pm

Now I know why Rabobank has been systematically paying lousy interest on my savings account. The $'s been going to make the chicken fly faster. Sad. Guess I'll have to put my money at Saxo Bank....

By: Quentin Internal Routing
Sun, 01/20/2013 - 12:27pm

Many Rabobank cyclists are now admitting systematic doping in their team since 1996 and getting the necessary assistance from doctors to do so. They say the doping scheme was run top down. 'Doping was a way of life for them according to Thomas Dekker. Apparently Rasmussen was doing the 2007 tour, the one he got pulled out of b/c of his whereabouts, on 5 bags of blood, 100,000 units of EPO, testosterone and cortico's. Rabobank and Rasmussen are still in court regarding a 5.8 million euro settlement.

...well now...
By: bikesoverthemoon
Sat, 01/19/2013 - 10:09pm

...i certainly feel better about that young man now that i've seen the warmth, contrition & sincerity emanating from his exposed & obviously 'oh so honest' soul...

...trying not to choke over the love, bgw...

Lance could really use some
By: Goro Polished
Sat, 01/19/2013 - 5:33am

Lance could really use some Ugg boots right about now.

By: Marco Seatmast
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 11:34pm

Did you notice Lance checking out Oprah's Ta-Tas? I bet he was imagining how they would look on his latest baby-mama.

maybe tonight lance will
By: Goro Polished
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 10:38pm

maybe tonight lance will bring over a bucket of magnolia bakery banana pudding, smear it all over himself and roll around with oprah.

now that's tv worth watching.

Lance the Hein Hater
By: Sacha Saddlesore
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 10:10pm

I've always hated the UCI. Really. I have.

not even his mouth was big
By: Jarne Hammer
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 9:59pm

not even his mouth was big enough for that foot. pt 2 could prove to be brutal

lance making fat jokes in
By: Goro Polished
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 9:35pm

lance making fat jokes in front of t.v.'s most weight-sensitive personality: priceless.

By: Quentin Internal Routing
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 7:28pm

Did he just say that Winfrey was fat?

Come Watch Lance/Oprah
By: DG
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 7:25pm

9pm- Lance and Oprah part 2
Nevada Smiths-125 East 11th St (btwn 3rd and 4th Ave)

"I'm sorry, Oprah, I'm afraid
By: DA 9000
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 6:51am

"I'm sorry, Oprah, I'm afraid I can't do that."

Is this the end...
By: Noe Supple
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 6:05am

of Toto's material?

Hey Dan
By: Alessandro Fork
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 5:01am

You've disgraced the color yellow.

Hey Dan
By: Thomas Kevlar
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 4:42am

I never called you fat.

Hey Dan,
By: Ryan Locknut
Fri, 01/18/2013 - 3:40am

Did you ever have a transvaginal mesh?

Fun never ends...
By: Thomas Headset
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 9:57pm

Just replace "Armstrong" with "Wiggins" and we can start all over again.

"Wot you doin'..I'm bustin' me arse 6 hours a day."

Armstrong fetish
By: Sam Stiff
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 8:56pm

choose your tyranny: haters or fans

OK, setting up the paywall
By: schmalz
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 8:30pm

OK, setting up the paywall right now

Oh come on, call it your
By: Elias Gel
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 7:32pm

Oh come on, call it your Armstrong adieu, or in the words of Bob Roll, your "Fee-Nall-Eee."

Live blogging the Doprah is
By: schmalz
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 7:26pm

Live blogging the Doprah is played out

How about a Tour Day Schmalz play-by-play?
By: Setscrew
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 7:10pm

If you don't resurrect the TdS for a blow-by-blow account of the Oprah show, I'm boycotting this fucking site forever.

just 'cuz
By: whoever
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:12pm

one last punch of the (shit)bag that is fakestrong:


And Hincapie to join
By: Elias Gel
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:06pm

And Hincapie to join him.

Full circle, boys!

Lance to Mengoni.
By: Mateo Dropout
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:06pm

Lance to Mengoni.

Lance to announce he will be
By: Richard Simmons
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 4:37pm

Lance to announce he will be Oprah's new personal trainer.

By: Adam Stiff
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 1:58pm

Lance Armstrong killed Manti Te'o's fake girlfriend.

By: Lukas Bushing
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 6:08am

Hey Andy and Dan, why is that the classifieds doesn't show the real new items for sale ow whatever on the "new classifieds" section ??? all the classifieds now are from january 2012 ???? thanks....

stop whining.
By: Jacopo Seatmast
Thu, 01/17/2013 - 3:57am

Your criticisms fo R&A MIGHT be true, but if there is a specific hard to find part you are looking for, chances are R&A will have the part in the size and color you want. You will pay more, but you get more.

Or how about a coupon for
By: Mathias Bushing
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 6:38pm

Or how about a coupon for really lousy customer service?

Oh wait, you can get both of those things without having to even race.


Sweet! Will the top prizes
By: Mathias Bushing
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 6:37pm

Sweet! Will the top prizes include a coupon to pay over MSRP for products?

r and a
By: take dat
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 5:32pm

nice! hosting a series in pp?! all you people whining about them can suck it

I for one would welcome a
By: Remi Limit Screw
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 4:15pm

I for one would welcome a beer review about now

I'm flattered that people
By: schmalz
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 3:36pm

I'm flattered that people think we have something to add right now.

next fraud up
By: Remi Fork
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 3:32pm

Now dan'nAndi will be revealed. they are a fraud and have nothing to add after Lance

ellipsis dots
By: Simon Steerer
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 2:53pm

Smug aloofness somehow perfectly translated by over use of ....

Dylan casy
By: Rosso Bushing
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 2:25pm

SO......who's SHITTING now?....Steve Johnson,......DYLAN CASEY..... TOM Weisel..... AMGEN..... Bristol Meyer Squib......Johan Bruynell.. where ARE YOU....come out come out and play . PATTY Mc.....Darth Verbruggen. AND lets not forget the person who is Way beyond a facilitator...... CHRIS CHARMICHAEL...... welcome to truth of Consequences...............

...yo, jules clamp...
By: bikesoverthemoon
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 6:20am

...far out, man, that's heavy...glad you laid it on us & i can totally dig it...

...these toto dorks are usually cool but they need to hang loose instead of freakin' out just 'cuz you're so enlightened, man...

...don't sweat it & don't get bummed out, dude...i dig your groovy aura...

...like, with peace & love, bgw...

...it's about time...
By: bikesoverthemoon
Wed, 01/16/2013 - 4:56am

...someone exposed that lying, cheating, two faced beatch for what she really is & thank god we had lance gunderson & the "L" show to do it...

...i heard every audience member found a folding dahon bike under their seat after the show...

...with appreciation & a love of truth, bgw...

who or what is the person in
By: Victor Biopace
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 10:54pm

who or what is the person in the background of the last frame?


Back to hot sandbagging talk,
By: schmalz
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 10:12pm

Back to hot sandbagging talk, my friends.

A better question is whats
By: Baldo Wave Ring
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 9:49pm

A better question is whats this site going to do!

So what
By: Giacamo Brifter
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 9:29pm

Man, now that he's confessed what are these comics gonna do!

Full Oprah script available here!
By: Jordan Tank
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 7:25pm

Dear kindly Oprah Winfrey,
You gotta understand,
It's just our bringin' up-fe
That gets us out of hand.
Our mothers all are junkies,
Our fathers all are drunks.
Golly Moses, natcherly we're punks!

Gee, Oprah Winfrey, we're very upset;
We never had the love that ev'ry child oughta get.
We ain't no delinquents,
We're misunderstood.
Deep down inside us there is cash!

There is cash!

There is cash, there is cash,
There is untapped cash!
Like inside, the worst of us has cash!

SNOWBOY: (Spoken) That's a touchin' good story.

ACTION: (Spoken) Lemme tell it to the world!

SNOWBOY: Just tell it to the judge.

Dear kindly Judge, your Honor,
My parents treat me rough.
With all their EPO,
They won't give me a puff.
They didn't wanna have me,
But somehow I was had.
Leapin' lizards! That's why I'm so bad!

DIESEL: (As Judge) Right!

Oprah Winfrey, you're really a square;
This boy don't need a judge, he needs an analyst's care!
It's just his neurosis that oughta be curbed.
He's psychologic'ly disturbed!

I'm disturbed!

We're disturbed, we're disturbed,
We're the most disturbed,
Like we're psychologic'ly disturbed.

DIESEL: (Spoken, as Judge) In the opinion on this court, this child is depraved on account he ain't had a normal home.

ACTION: (Spoken) Hey, I'm depraved on account I'm deprived.

DIESEL: So take him to a headshrinker.

ACTION (Sings)
My father is a bastard,
My ma's an S.O.B.
My grandpa's always plastered,
My trainer pushes tea.
My sister wears a mustache,
My manager wears a dress.
Goodness gracious, that's why I'm a mess!

A-RAB: (As Psychiatrist) Yes!
Oprah Winfrey, you're really a slob.
This boy don't need a doctor, just a good honest job.
UCI's played him a terrible trick,
And sociologic'ly he's sick!

I am sick!

We are sick, we are sick,
We are sick, sick, sick,
Like we're sociologically sick!

There was a time in cycling
By: tomdabeast
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 7:16pm

There was a time in cycling when there was limit to how much a cyclist could receive dollar wise, here in America.I think the limit was $2,000 and boy that was big big money. Most of the time you received a medal, and maybe a little prize money and you would grind your teeth and gears for a few bucks for those primes. I think once the money started pooring into cycling it greated a monster.

when cycling took the wrong turn
By: tomdabeast
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 7:14pm

There was a time in cycling when there was limit to how much a cyclist could receive dollar wise, here in America.I think the limit was $2,000 and boy that was big big money. Most of the time you received a medal, and maybe a little prize money and you would grind your teeth and gears for a few bucks for those primes. I think once the money started pooring into cycling it greated a monster.

Truth be told, still would
By: Logan Tubie
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 6:55pm

Truth be told, still would have been kept a "dirty little secret" if it were not for him being such a dick

Exposed: he had no choice
By: Lapo Ferrule
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 5:59pm

Truth be told, still would have been kept a "dirty little secret" if it were not for the USADA.
Shame on him for misleading the world.

"All, I'm saying is that if
By: Aaron Brifter
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 5:47pm

"All, I'm saying is that if Lance admits to doping his entire career. I say show me the proof. Otherwise, it is just heresay. And if you believe that Lance is a liar and he lied about not doping before, how do you not know that he is lying about doping now?"

Another Great Article by Reed
By: Cheatto Winfrey
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 5:23pm

Also, on ESPN radio this morning, Peter Flax, editor of Bicycling seemed more interested in protecting his magazines bottom line than being candid about Lance while Velo's editor Neal Rodgers cleary hit the nail on the head by acknowleging the good that Lance did for the sport yet also clearly doing more to destroy it.

Don't bogart that joint my
By: Marius Skidmark
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 4:11pm

Don't bogart that joint my friend

Jules Clamp to Bellevue
By: Cheatto Winfrey
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 3:43pm

Jules Clamp to Bellevue

Tom..is that you??
By: Sporgen Usnuts
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 3:29pm

Tom..is that you??

Lance swims with dolphin?
By: mrvelro
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 10:58am


Lance Armstrong is innocent.
By: Jules Clamp
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 10:26am

Lance Armstrong is innocent. How do I know this? Simple. We are in phase of unprecedented evolution of consciousness for humanity, the Earth and all life .

Any true 'lightworker' knows how to 'read energy' underlying any spoken, or written word. It can be deciphered through the amazing 'truth meter' available to everyone within their own being; a filter of divine frequencies of light, energy, essence and love within the heart core; the divine within us all. When we enter this sacred space we resonate with the vibration frequencies of the highest levels of divine, unconditional love. When we ask a question and intend to know the answer that is the highest of truth, there can be no deception, because there is no fear-based consciousness in divinity - only love-based consciousness.

This way of being and doing is the 'modus operandi' of right-brain attributes; intuition, creativity, subjectivity, and much more. Right brain method is global, whole/holistic way of access. Left-brain is linear functioning; logic and reasoning. One could pose that left-brain only uses half the brain, while right-brain uses all the brain!

As humanity evolves and changes to more whole-brain functioning (interestingly, dolphins are whole-brain functioning mammals), we access more of the skills, abilities, gifts and talents within us for creative pursuits that benefit us, and all life, in a way which and brings us joy; our birthright as human beings to fulfill our unlimited potential.

Lance is an example of fulfilling an inspirational life of purpose.

Lance has beaten cancer ('Can-seer'). There are interests that do not like this; so he has been targeted. Mind control methods, financial reward and blackmail can induce 'witnesses' to act and speak to predetermined scripts.

Lance has been wise to not engage in any ill-founded debate. It only adds energy to his detractors. Maybe now is the right time to address this for him, as the light has expanded exponentially, and continues to do so.

Toto to the Smithsonian.
By: Alessandro Pinchbolt
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 5:11am

Toto to the Smithsonian.

questions (or lack there of)
By: FB
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 3:57am

Any bet it's going to be an emotion based interview? Let's see how many times Johan or UCI are mentioned. Do you think he took her to the Yellow Rose for lunch?

By: Hamza Torque
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 2:54am

at this point - armstrong media ban, i mean its all bullshit now, controlling media, can i pay for you guys to never type armstrong again?

A warm load for the whore
By: So, So Supple
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 2:32am

I'm just not sure which one deserves it most.

Cognitive dissonance
By: Mathias Locknut
Tue, 01/15/2013 - 12:49am

Lance with JV sideburns in panel one.

one big fracking joke
By: Remi Stiff
Mon, 01/14/2013 - 11:29pm

This whole Orca, I mean Oprah thing is just another silly page from the Lance Gunderson playbook. Only a gullible, lonely fool would believe that Lance would be able to suddenly transform himself into a real human being and be able to honestly confess to anything resembling the truth.

Btw, Toto for president!

Pushmi Pullyu
By: monorchid conconi
Mon, 01/14/2013 - 10:58pm

This breed of llama became extinct long ago, because both ends could eat, but neither was able to poop.

You're not worth the sectional...
By: Schmirnov
Mon, 01/14/2013 - 9:30pm

I don't know, designer leather sectionals can really get pricey.....

the moral
By: Samuel Grips
Mon, 01/14/2013 - 9:15pm

The moral in cycling has changed so quickly during the last decade. In all sports they have been using peds and especially in cycling. Arthur Linton supposedly did strychnine and nitroglycerine with help of the Ferrari of his time, or more recent Indurain and Boonen? Cycling has always been a shady sport. Races have been sold. The strongest did not always win. A sport of the catholics and not of the protestants. A sport of competitive forgiveness not of competitive moralism. We want a simplification of the truth in what is good and what is bad. Unfortunately Lance took it to main street and put it in the hands of wall street. Now it seems every cyclist is being held accountable for a century of romanticism. For a decade he lied about it, bullied others using his cycling millions to keep his empire alive. Now it is time to milk the last bit of juice out of this story while he's at Oprah's couch. Wonder if Oprah is going to ask about his cancer. What's next. Betsie and Lance at Jerry Springer?

tugging and tugging
By: Dong Work For Yuda
Mon, 01/14/2013 - 7:18pm

Both sides of the argument, just furiously masturbating away...

my love for you big Tex.
By: Python
Mon, 01/14/2013 - 6:09pm

I love you Lance. Makes my day to know you are doing the right thing. Forget what the Race Radio says just do your own thingie. My love for you never stops throbbing.

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