Affinity Cycles

Section head text.

For immediate release

Affinity Cycles is pleased to announce its entry into the New York City

cycling scene, with a unique new line of racing frames, and our retail shop

located at 616 Grand St. in Williamsburg Brooklyn, opening in April 2007.

Additionally, we are proud to announce the CRCA/Affinity Cycles Racing Team.

Here’s a few highlights of the products and services Affinity Cycles will be

offering:

– A proprietary track frame inspired by pursuit style geometry, with a

distinctive sloped top tube and tight aggressive geometry. Its a perfect

bike for the track enthusiast, or as a street machine.

– Affinity carbon fiber road and time trial frames. Full monocoque

frame and fork kits at great prices

– Fix-it facilities with a full line of professional tools where you

can wrench on your bike yourself, not to mention a laid back atmosphere

and pro cycling races projected on the wall at all times.

– A racer’s Discount to all riders with a current racing license, up

to 20% on some products (see the website for details)

– Reliable professional mechanics to service and tune your bike on the

spot.

Our goals this year are to support racers and commuters alike, sell bikes

but more importantly, we look forward to getting smashed on cheap beer and

blowing your low-fat race diet on greasy pizza at our parties for the

one-day classics and grand tours.

The CRCA/Affinity Cycles racing team is comprised of a group of knuckleheads

who love to wear tights and race with CRCA, and on a regional level. We are

the awesomest team in the whole wide world. There are a number of hot new

teams this season that will probably stomp us into the ground at most races.

Because of this, we plan to have fifth place secured (so step off, suckas!)

Our many thanks to our title sponsors for the 2007 racing season, Kleen

Construction, Integrated Studios, Gaslight G2 bar and lounge, Stellar

hardwood floors, and Jaypeg Inc. photography studio.

Riders

Steve Brownlie – Cat 4

Brownlie started cycling competitively last year and quickly realized that

he should specialize in short, slightly downhill races with tailwinds. Steve

is however very strong and brings an unusual talent to the team. He is

capable of leg-pressing large human beings, Rosie O’Donnell being one…not

once, but 4 times!!! During the day he has a financial job and he’ll

probably keep doing that until Predictor-Lotto calls…looking for a missing

pair of McEwen’s dirty bib shorts. Mr. Brownlie lives happily with his wife

and 3 cockroaches in a cardboard box in Central Park under that tree. You

know which one.

Kevin Brubaker – Cat 4

At birth, Kevin had to deal with a rare deformity…oops, wrong bio. Green

machines, Stingrays, GTs, Pro-Flexes, Geisha…Kevin’s ridden ’em all.

Affinity Cycles is the next wet saddle in his rather longish illustrious

life. When not losing the bishop on some countless lap in Central Park or

losing brain cells on sub-zero rides up 9W working off his mexican food

obsession, you can find Kevin behind a sound console mixing some horrible,

overpriced show far from Broadway or behind a drumset around town playing in

some bands you’ve never heard of. Kevin likes drooling inadvertently on

people, wrangling injured squirrels along the westside bikepath, and

lecturing livery vehicles who fail to use blinkers. And oh yeah….he’s both

a licenced sadist AND registered masochist.

Chris Chaput – Cat 3

He’s been racing on and off since 2001 and thought he was going to be one of

those cat 4-for-life guys….that is until he read an article in the Oswegan

Veterinary Journal that concluded a study proving mountain goats actually

respond favorably to helium therapy. Chris hasn’t landed yet. Besides having

the power-to-weight ratio of a Saturn 5 rocket, Mr. Chaput is a closet

Canadian. (We’re all trying to marry him to get citizenship) Doing graphic-y

stuff on an Atari 400, trying to fit into women’s size 0 clothes, and

hanging out in the Point of Green put a grin on the little cherub’s face.

Jason Gallacher – Cat 3

Jason’s been on two wheels since his mother got on a tipping gurney. BMX,

you know those twitchy little machines we all cut out teeth on, really found

a place with the boy and he managed to do a little more than just deliver

papers on it. Mr. Gallacher can throw down a sprint like Cru Jones in Rad

and is faster than a Festina driver to a trashcan. Unfortunately he climbs

like your granny in her power-chair. When not working on photography (if you

call pushing a button “working”), Mr. Gallacher is busy being the mad

scientist co owner behind Affinity Cycles, attaching spare parts together

with resin and carbon fiber. Other than bike racing, Jason is on a tireless

quest to create a 3 lb. bike, tour the universe by any means at his

disposal, and take a pictures of every brown paper bag ever made.

Andy Gipp – Cat 3

Andras-Neil-Nilinjana-Mr. Pink-Agent #24 was born in Hungary a long time

ago. (We think he’s either a vampire…a benevolent one mind you, or an

Eastern Block secret agent) Moussad has a pleasant cover job tuning and

refurbishing expensive pianos where he’s picked up some fancy tricks with

piano wire. When not running a lumber company back in his homeland (total

crap…they don’t have trees anymore in Hungary), Comrade Gippalinius is

honing his martial arts skills making tea and rendering thugs useless with

his pinkies. On a bike, he’s even more ruthless, leaving a trail of exploded

quadriceps in his wake when he decides to “have some fun”.

Kevan Griffin – Cat 3

Have you ever seen that movie “Children of the Corn”? Kevan hails from that

ever-so-popular state of Nebraska where he actually introduced the bicycle

to the workers of the earth. After much early success and Olympic talk, he

thought eating donuts and mixing people’s records would be more fun so he

moved east. Realizing the NYPD ate all the donuts and getting an offer from

Steve Brownlie to be leg-pressed hurt his ego, Mr. Griffin decided to give

it all back and hasn’t looked forward since…uh…wait. Kevan is real happy

to be on the team and gettin’ to ride the new Affinity bikes ‘n all, seein’s

how he’s been riding an 83′ Cannondale since forever. Make no mistake

though…Kevan is our hidden weapon, hiding in the stalks, waiting for his

moment to attack. When he does, you’ll never know where your bike went.

Rashad Guerra – Cat 3

He likes bikes. So much so that he’s invested over a billion dollars in this

new shop in hopes of laundering even larger amounts of cash. Alas however,

Rashad’s only real motivation for co-owning a bike shop is to get dealer

discounts on high end bike bling (it’s the only way he could entice a group

of broke freeloaders to join the team). When not riding his wee-little 51cm

pocket rocket to dizzying speeds, Mr. “Watt ya doin” is riding his dog/horse

Zoe around the living room, trying to make his little baby daughter laugh

formula out her nose. Rashad would also like to thank his wife Joy for

putting up with his crap.

Ken Reynolds – Cat 5

5′ 11″, weighing in at 36 years old and hailing from the Land of Ire (must

be why he’s always pissed off), we have yet another ex-pat on the

Affinity team rounding out this motley, cosmopolitan wrecking crew. Ken is

returning to racing after a brief hiatus. An eighteen year hiatus to be

exact so he’s going to have to get used to riding a bike that’s not

wood. Although Mr. Reynolds (aka Mr. Kleen) is a fledgling cat. 5 racer, he

has a really tight relationship with his pharmacist and should shoot up the

ranks quite quickly. Ken is a bit nostalgic sporting his black hockey helmet

and steel frame (not wood thankfully) but we’ll break him of that with the

lure of shiny things that make your wallet shrink and tell lies to your

wife. Honestly, we really only brought him on board because he has a nifty

accent.

We look forward to fighting it out at the races, and having beers while

watching someone other than Big George win Paris Roubaix. For more

information on the shop, how to become a sponsor or to heckle us, please

contact Jason Gallacher jason@affinitycycles.com or Rashad Guerra

rashad@affinitycycles.com and please check out or soon to be posted website

at www.affinitycycles.com.

18 Comments

getinline

Very amusing writing. Sounds like it will be a fun shop. Will your mechanic(s) help those who want to come learn how to wrench with your tools?? That would be a huge draw for me.

Faber

Nice Intro. Brownlie was a fun teammate to have around AND a bad ass. We already know Rashad is bad ass.
Good luck team.

JHS

good luck with the shop and the team. Can’t wait till you guys open ahop! See you at the races (but tell Ken to drop the hockey helmet! it’s a distraction in the races …like, what the f(*& is that guy wearing?).

Neu

Sounds like a great team. Rashad was the outstanding new rider on the scene in ’06 and really rides tough. Good luck with the season and the shop.

Ted

shaw

good luck boys. nice kit. looks like there will be a lot to read on it when i’m sucking your wheels.

Affinity

Thanks for all of the great posts, we can’t wait to finally open as well (its been a long time in the making). We’ll definitely offer help if you guys have any questions about wrenching.

Sorry jhs but we love Kens helmet, we’re all getting team helmets soon but not ken he’s our mascot. We’ve got no shame with the skate helmet, I have one more word about that… Zapp!

Again thanks for the support, we look forward to hooking you guys up with a great place to come to, the racing parties and good wrenches…

Affinity

Thanks for all of the great posts, we can’t wait to finally open as well (its been a long time in the making). We’ll definitely offer help if you guys have any questions about wrenching.

Sorry jhs but we love Kens helmet, we’re all getting team helmets soon but not ken he’s our mascot. We’ve got no shame with the skate helmet, I have one more word about that… Zapp!

Again thanks for the support, we look forward to hooking you guys up with a great place to come to, the racing parties and good wrenches…

shaw

good luck boys. nice kit. looks like there will be a lot to read on it when i’m sucking your wheels.

Neu

Sounds like a great team. Rashad was the outstanding new rider on the scene in ’06 and really rides tough. Good luck with the season and the shop.

Ted

Jay

Very amusing writing. Sounds like it will be a fun shop. Will your mechanic(s) help those who want to come learn how to wrench with your tools?? That would be a huge draw for me.

Faber

Nice Intro. Brownlie was a fun teammate to have around AND a bad ass. We already know Rashad is bad ass.
Good luck team.

jhs

good luck with the shop and the team. Can’t wait till you guys open ahop! See you at the races (but tell Ken to drop the hockey helmet! it’s a distraction in the races …like, what the f(*& is that guy wearing?).

Comments are closed.