schmalz last FBF

meow kitties

 For a certain sub-set of New York City bike racers, the end of the Tuesday night series at FBF is one of the sure signs of the end of summer. Certainly, the end of the series means a respite from the exertion required to simply make it out to the races—my own personal Tuesday night sojourn requires a six hour slice carved out of my life’s pie that—in all honesty—would be better spent parenting my kids or listening and understanding the words that come out of the mouths of the people I care about. But sometimes the attraction of sweating and panting with sixty-odd other men as we bounce across a tarmac neither fit for man nor bike is just too alluring.

Odes to man-pack perspiration notwithstanding, the last race at FBF is a turning point of my personal calendar. It means another summer has passed, another season is almost complete and that I am still capable of pedaling in a semi-competitive nature. At my age (if I were firewood, I would be “seasoned”, if I were cheese, I would be “depending upon storage conditions, most probably fatal to consume”), I often fall into the trap of wondering how many seasons I have left in the assembly of bone, blood, gristle and delusion I call “me”. If this season at FBF was any indiction, the answer to that question is “probably some more”. Granted, that evaluation isn’t going to be printed on any t-shirts, but at my age, I’ll take it.

The past few weeks of racing at FBF have seen the rise of the ageless sprint of James J and the concurrent demise of the overall win hopes of Cesar A. Many times, the series at FBF will come down to a contest between a sprinter and a strong rider who can get into breaks and hold his own in sprints, and this year’s race followed that story line. With two races to go, Cesar was battling against James for the overall win. Due to a broken chain in the penultimate race, James didn’t score any points and was holding onto a two point lead over Cesar. The strategy was clear, Cesar would need to drop James to have any hope at wining the series.

If this were the plan adopted by Cesar’s Triangle Cyclists team, then I didn’t see any evidence of it. Cesar’s team usually had about five to six racers in the field, and it would seem that with these numbers, they could dictate tactics to a certain extent, but they didn’t seem interested in controlling the race. Having missed out on many races due to living a life on Tuesdays, I was out of contention; but due to not having much of a life, I was also aware that Cesar’s only hope was to get in a breakaway. And being a conniving bike racer, I hoped to benefit from that fact. But Cesar’s team didn’t seem to be able or interested in creating the circumstances for a break to occur. Granted, this isn’t an easy task, especially as James was steadily gaining form as the series went on—and was getting harder to drop—but why not bike race?

I watched the last race of the series play out like the slow motion footage of a cheetah chasing an antelope in a nature film. Breaks were chased down, no efforts were made to get Cesar away and Cesar himself was at the front of the race with James tenaciously stalking his back tire. Being a bit of an antelope myself, this was hard for me to watch, but with every lap that passed, an antelope feast became more and more inevitable. James the cheetah won the race, with Cesar finishing fourth, and the cheetahs took the series once again.
I ended my Tuesday season by trying to sneak away and catch the fast cats off guard, but I was caught and devoured at the line. But I jumped because I know that I’m an antelope, and trying to blend in with a pack of cheetahs only gets you chewed up faster.


meat grinder

Kosher rider seen going down in the video and Houlihan Lokey rider were both removed by ambulance. Unknown injuries on Kosher, but broken collar bone for HL rider.

I guess the Foundation guy was more or less OK.

Two things: Hold your line. Don’t half-wheel.

Doffo Skidmark

Both the Kosher and Foundation guys are fine relatively, nothing broken. Just road rash and bruised egos.

Schiatta Pulley

great video. so lucy, splain’ me why you even bother winding it up as a mid pack finisher? could the answer be that you figure the race is euro-like, and if everyone is somewhat connected, you get the same finishing time? jj has skills. but he is also knocking on what,58? to let him school you week after week, like schmaltz said, is pathetic. (my words). anyway, it’s always nice to mash up your 6k ride on that shitty course. have something to look forward to next season.

Guccio Seattube

I’d put the blame on the guy who chopped his wheel. Can’t protect your wheel when someone comes from behind you and jumps right into your line. Just makes you a dick.

Romain Butyl

why on earth are 20+ guys sprinting for what, 14th place?

it you ain’t top top 5-10 maybe, soft pedal, sit up and enjoy the stench.

Keano Plug

First there is no way to protect your wheel when a guys makes such a radical side movement. Someone earlier said don’t half-wheel. well i would venture to say that before the front guy chopped the victims wheel there was so much separation that you would not call it crossing wheels.

Second to many guys sprinting for 15th place. I only hear Charlie announce it every week that you should not sprint with your head down and there is a race almost every day in NYC so if you are not in contention it does not make sense to take chances. But people don’t seem to be listening. Maybe as part of the upgrade requirement from CAT 5 to 4 riders should take a hearing test or maybe an IQ test.

Nolan Swage

FBF is fucking impossible to get to during the week unless you’re willing to take your life into your hands on Flatbush… 9w isn’t great during the week, but it’s still a hell of a lot better than that Brooklyn traffic sewer.

I still contend that it’s the best local racing series in our area… good vibe, course is actually paved unlike FBF, relatively accessible, etc


There is a rule by holding a straight line in a sprint for the last 200m. Problem is that in this race no one can sprint straight to begin with. Not much you can do.

Guccio Seattube

Enforcement of the rules is funny…. whenever you speak to the ref’s they say they didn’t see it, or deny it happened because god forbid they admit they fucked up another race 🙂

Guillaume Plug

It seems like people have gotten so comfortable with dodging potholes throughout the race and considering the impact the riders around them, that the sprint is treated that way as well. Overall poor adequate during the race.

Guillaume Plug

It seems like people have gotten so comfortable with dodging potholes throughout the race and considering the impact the riders around them, that the sprint is treated that way as well. Overall poor adequate during the race.

Noah Topcap

Are you kidding me. The Axis guy drifted so slowly. I saw 10 other way more sketchy moves in that last stretch than that. It sucks that it caused a crash but he had about 4 full pedal strokes to react to the Axis guy. And yes, none of those guys at that point in pack should have been sprinting.

Nathan Hammer

If you are sprinting your cadence is round 125+, but lets say 125. divide 60 secs by 125 and you get 2 seconds for the 4 pedal strokes to perceive the movement. If you can perceive and act that quickly you are super human. Oh by they way you may have a slow internet connection which slows frame speed.

Keano Plug

The fault is with both parts abd may be others as well. Lots of guys with their heads down, too many guys sprinting for 10th, and lines like drunk drivers.


I want to address something a little F*XXXed up for a moment.

It seems that every year the Tour de Fort Lee has something fishy happen. 2 years ago it was Claxito Burros lapping the field solo, last year it was a Cat 2 in the Cat 3 race and this year an Australian Cat 1 in the Cat 5 race.

An Aussie rider was visiting and wanted to race. He did not have a US or UCI license. Therefore his only option was to enter the Cat 5 race as a Day-of No Unlicensed rider. He was riding for Talent cycles from whom he borrowed a kit and a bike which was too small.

From the gun he attacked the field and within the short 18 mile race (I think it was 18 miles) he lapped the field TWICE. The remaining Cat 5s immediately tried to chase after the rider blowing themselves up in the process. Sort of make for misrable racing if you’re a newbie.

I would like to call on USAC rulemakers and officials to do something to prevent this from happening. I’ve seen it before and think it’s unfair to the other riders. A discussion with the Aussie rider post race showed that he felt a little embarrased being in the Cat 5 race and sort of felt bad for the riders.

Yes, he should have gone out to the Nyack ride or something, but instead chose to be a pussy and stomp on the Cat 5s. How did the officials not see this going on and DQ him after the race?

Martin Tank

the guy who got clipped was sprinting with his head down. which you should definitely not do especially that far back. having said that no one should deviate from their line. so they are both partly at fault.

Baldo Axle

You can write fuck here. As in “froom is whiney fuck.”

Some guy from some other country will come and show up, claim to be a 2 or a 1, and then cause a crash and you’d fucking whine about that too.

Just figure out how to stay out of the joggers lane and worry about yourself, you goddamn yenta.

Guccio Seattube

The problem isn’t so simple because many countries do not have “skill-based” categories such as Cat.1 to Cat. 5 as we do in the US. The UCI really only has age based categories such as Cadets, Juniors, Elite, Masters, etc… I don’t know if Australia or Columbia have skill-based categories, so to the extent that they don’t, it’s pretty much up to the rider to pick which category he thinks he belongs to here because Cat 1 to 5 are open age categories. The promoters don’t really know how to deal with foreign licenses and have been inconsistent at best. I don’t think USAC has developed a way with dealing with it either


“When an Australian laps the field, does he circle around the race the opposite way?”

No, but Gran Fondos are organized and completed in the opposite way.


Oderigo Chainline

The Aussie was an elite triathlete, not a cat 1. He borrowed a bike because all he had with him was his tri bike.


Cross is never over. Its for all the cornballs that never smelled victory or top 10 during the regular season.


It’s just sept you take off? So the rest of the year when you are totally absent, you consider it “work”? We all know Andy carries this site, which will soon be nyhelicity and will be posting articles and comments about that dude in the park using illegal silicon parts on his drones…

Guccio Seattube

Technically it was Pro/1 only, but I wouldn’t be surprised if promoter missed that or turned a blind eye.


Stop FUck’n training in CP. GO for a nice ride, but don’t train. Yes, this site will likely be gone soon. Hopefully someone not stuck in 1993 website design and maintenance skills will start a new one.

Nolan Swage

is NYC bike racing dying? Bethel’s now gone, tons of good road races have disappeared in the last 5 years, even Dieter sounds like he wants out, the city parks are crowded as shit constantly to the point of pedestrians getting killed, and even this website is dead lately… so depressing

Guccio Seattube

Anyone get their prize money from Frenchtown TT yet? Not a fan of “we’ll send you a check in the mail format”….

Comments are closed.